I was glad that Sandberg spent some time on the inequality/equality topic. Not that long ago, as a new manager, I straddled the likability fence. I wanted everyone to like me, but found that it was hindering my ability to do my job. When I found out that, because I was actually supervising, some of my employees didn’t like me. That hurt, but I had to get over it. Would those who were upset by me have reacted differently if I was a man? Were my expectations different because I supervise mostly women?
Is there a gender gap? Does Sandbergs’ advice help you as you make your way up the jungle gym?
Sandberg finishes the book with the idea of working together toward equality. She suggests that the struggle between stay at home moms and working outside of the home moms needs to end.
“None of this is attainable unless we pursue these goals together. Men need to support women and, I wish it went without saying, women need to support women too…As obvious as this sounds, women have not always worked together in the past. In fact, there are many discouraging examples where women have actually done the opposite. (p.160.)
How can we work to encourage this cooperation? What are the barriers?
Sandberg mentions that everyone likes a fight, but catfights are even more fascinating. For so long we women have been battling the “mommy wars” – moms who work outside of the home vs. those who stay at home and work. In the end both sides feel judged by the other and guilty. On page 168 she states, “We all want the same thing: to feel comfortable with our choices and to feel validated by those around us. so let’s start by validating one another. Mothers who work outside the home should regard mothers who work inside the home as real workers. and mothers who work inside the home should be equally respectful of those choosing another option.”
Do you believe that this is possible? Is it possible to project a united force?
I leave you with her thoughts.
“Equal opportunity is not equal unless everyone receives the encouragement that makes seizing those opportunities possible. (p. 160.)